Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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