Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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