big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
