There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
