I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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