I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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