just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
