butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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