break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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