What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
We need to get me chipped asap
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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