all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize