i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize
