I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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