Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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