dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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