You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
