plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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