It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
