Screwed.edu
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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