I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize