You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize