I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
