if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
