Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.

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  (415): Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events. http://tfl.nu/5em3
  Replies (16) Good night (1997) Bad night (575) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?

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  (970): How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy? http://tfl.nu/ky06
  Replies (27) Good night (5985) Bad night (753) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.

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  (732): I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there. http://tfl.nu/dxiw
  Replies (7) Good night (3863) Bad night (1038) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on

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  (503): Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on http://tfl.nu/atvv
  Replies (12) Good night (779) Bad night (3998) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.

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  (318): the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese. http://tfl.nu/xs1m
  Replies (7) Good night (3351) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?

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  (609): is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact? http://tfl.nu/ny5t
  Replies (30) Good night (1660) Bad night (7249) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  bloody. ill be home soon.

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  (215): so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know? (267): bloody. ill be home soon. http://tfl.nu/2ypq
  Replies (7) Good night (3624) Bad night (904)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?

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  (915): Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere? http://tfl.nu/8ktc
  Replies (15) Good night (1031) Bad night (2725) Order T-Shirt
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.

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  (812): Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them. http://tfl.nu/jsyg
  Replies (4) Good night (1267) Bad night (640) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home

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  (817): I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home http://tfl.nu/rtxe
  Replies (4) Good night (1732) Bad night (467) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I think we need to teach you what straight means again

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  (778): I think we need to teach you what straight means again http://tfl.nu/9bex
  Replies (3) Good night (1101) Bad night (335) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.

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  (207): I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom. http://tfl.nu/g4e2
  Replies (6) Good night (711) Bad night (360) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore

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  (502): Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore http://tfl.nu/xuyl
  Replies (9) Good night (1094) Bad night (313) Order T-Shirt
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?

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  (269): I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that? http://tfl.nu/gk3a
  Replies (6) Good night (652) Bad night (152)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Should I go sleeveless of strapless?

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.

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  (803): Should I go sleeveless of strapless? (1-803): Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it. http://tfl.nu/1uzl
  Replies (2) Good night (1286) Bad night (149) Order T-Shirt

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