perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
