but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
True strength comes from lack of pants
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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