stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
