she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
