i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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