we're blogging at a bar
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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