Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
