The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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