I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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