had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
