Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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