I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize