I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
