Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
