it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
