Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
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