You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
