So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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