piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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