If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
