Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
