He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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