i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize