do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Randomize
