She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
