"it" just moved
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
