I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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